What We're Reading Now
Self-Coaching Lessons from My Nephew
14 September 2021
Allison admired her nephew’s approach to self-coaching and recommitted her efforts to help herself make progress on her own goals.
Tags: allison read, coaching, self-talk, what william knows
Last month, I finally got to visit my brother and his family for the first time since the pandemic began. It was wonderful to be reunited and as is often the case, my nephew William educated and inspired me. (My niece and nephews have been blogging for us for seven years, and I’m certain you’ll appreciate what George IV, Kathryn, and William have to say about how to live.)
I got to drive the golf cart for William while he played nine holes, and I watched him coach himself like a true master. Before each hole, he’d casually mention what he knew about the hole based on previous rounds and what his goals were for himself. After each shot, he’d objectively tell me what he liked about what he did and where he thought he could improve next time. He was truly pleased when he did something well and didn’t beat himself up when he stumbled.
However, he didn’t just dismiss his mistakes. Instead, he used specific, descriptive, behavior-oriented observations to explain to me what went wrong, when he’d done better in the past, and what his plan was for improving next time. He could visualize what he wanted from himself for the next hole, and explained it to me. I asked a few questions to help him think through options, but mostly he asked himself what he wanted next and easily generated options for how to make it happen. Then, he simply moved on to the next hole. He seemed to let go of what had just happened and happily walked toward what was coming next.
My conversations with myself about some of my goals have improved since our visit. It was like William had already read one of our all-time favorite books, John Whitmore’s, Coaching for Performance. I think kids are the best teachers, and I sure am grateful for everything William reminded me of about the importance of steady self-talk when I need to coach myself toward a better outcome.
Comments
Our Comment Policy:
Our blog posts are only half of the conversation. What our readers have to say is equally important to us, and we're grateful for all the comments that continue the dialog.
To ensure that the discussion here is as useful as possible to all of our readers, please be respectful of our contributors and refrain from harassing, threatening and/or vulgar language. We reserve the right to screen and remove any comments from the site. If you have a question about a comment or want to discuss our policy, please contact us. We'll talk it over.
There are no comments for this entry yet.